Marital happiness dating patterns
Balance Leads to Harmony We also tend to overuse personality patterns with which we are most comfortable.When this occurs, our corresponding limitations become more glaring.How can couples avoid getting caught up in the power struggles of trying to change the other when their own particular way seems best?Henry Higgins in the musical, My Fair Lady, exemplifies this relational dilemma when he wonders why Eliza Dolittle can’t simply “be like me?” A Response The task of attempting to sculpt our marriage partner into our own likeness fails before it begins.God made us unique with our own particular style of “being,” and much of our personality patterns come with the package.For example, the extrovert becomes overbearing or the introvert may appear non-communicative.It’s true we don’t tend to change our basic preferences, but we can develop maturity within our basic style for the sake of our marriage.
It is second nature for him to keep careful records of how he spends money. She feels restricted when she has to stop and make note of every transaction, as Darrell would prefer.Identifying similarities and differences helps couples understand the dynamics of their relationship more clearly, but generosity towards each another is still key to personality compatibility.If we choose to see our differences as GIFTS, we are drawn towards greater acceptance.It contains a personality style assessment instrument and chapters on marriage and parenting. About the author Judy Clark is Co-Director of Family and Adult Ministry at St.
Mark the Evangelist Parish in Plano, Texas and a licensed professional counselor.
The saying, “I’m OK, you’re OK” can be applied to personality differences, for it reflects that no one style is better than the other, and that our differences are an expression of our God-given diversity.